some days... being female sucks!

hormones - bloody hate the things - nothing but trouble!

my body has to do everything OTT, it really doesn't ever do anything by halves - so when the hormones hit, they hit hard and they hit fast.

I was perfectly fine yesterday, I was almost giddy in fact, then all of a sudden it just disappeared and my mood and self-esteem plummeted, i began feeling really angry and embarrassed at myself for acting like a stupid silly child so much lately.... even though I know in my rational head it was all in good fun and was never taken too far.

I ended up heading off to bed simply because I couldn't face being around anyone, but just ended up laying there with my brain going 1,000 miles an hour, so i got up and did some of the stretches we do in class, it always cheers me up when I can bend so well so i thought it was worth a shot.

don't know why I didn't turn the lights on, but if you're gonna do stretches, i recommend that you do! balance was all over the place, didn't fall or anything but was REALLY wobbly- my head evidently wasn't sure which way was up!

it probably wasn't helped by the fact that i hated the dinner I'd made so all i had to eat since mid-afternoon was half a bag of salad and a non-fat yogurt!

yeah, in hindsight, probably not the best idea....

and it didn't really work, i was still awake at nearly 2am.

I woke bright eyed at just before 8am, which is a rarity for me on any day, let alone a Sunday, and I've really just been mulling about the house ever since.

I've spent some time on the rowing machine this morning in the hope of it getting my adrenaline going again, but really - it's just as boring as being on the exercise bike. I mean, I've always thought the rowing machine and exercise bike were a bit dull - but after you do a workout like zumba, they are just so tediously monotonously boring that I really can't bear to be on them for any length of time, even if I've got music going etc.... they're just so.... dull.... uninspiring... monotonous... take your pick or feel free to add!

just heard a rumble of thunder from outside - great. the changes in the weather really seem to be reflecting in my moods lately....

I've got to get my Sociology essay done today, I'm nearly there with the main body - I'm at just over 800 words and I'm aiming for about 1000. the introduction and conclusion pretty much write themselves afterwards so I'm not worrying about them just yet.

one positive thing about today is I don't seem anywhere near as bloated as I have been these past few days (I very nearly couldn't get my combat trousers on for zumba on Friday, which was bordering on mortifying!) so I'm actually seeing a bit of a difference now from all the workouts- I'm actually really starting to noticed a change in my upper arms and I know my hips are trimmer than they were before, just a shame thanks to the bursitis on my left hip that there's always a prominent swelling which i am hugely self conscious about...