telephonophobia

I've had telephonophobia for as long as I can remember, for those who don't know it's the irrational fear of using the phone. it's under the class of a social anxiety disorder.

sounds silly huh? well that's what makes it a phobia.

I have no idea how it started, but for as long as i can remember I've always avoided the phone like the plague.

My heart always starts racing when the phone rings, I feel cold and clammy, I feel light headed and sick to my stomach. this even happens when I'm listening to the radio and they're making calls, I have to turn over. I'm even getting clammy hands just writing about it.

I only ever answer the phone if the caller ID shows up and it's someone I know really well, but on bad days I can only really answer the phone if it's my parents or Paul.

I avoid making phonecalls at all costs, if I can text, e-mail, write a letter or even talk to the person in the flesh I will do that rather than making the call.

of course there are times when I've had no choice, like when we get our placements through from Uni - in those cases I have to do it very spur of the moment and get it over and done with or the anxiety just builds and builds and builds, but I'm usually sitting there shaking like a leaf throughout the whole call and for quite a while afterwards.

I know it all sounds so incredibly silly - what's the worst that can happen, right?

many a time I have been told to "just get over it" and believe me, if I had any say in the matter I would, but it's not quite as simple as that.

i guess a lot of it comes down to what society accepts - society readily accepts that people have phobias of spiders and snakes... animals which I keep as pets, but phobias such as using the telephone are less accepted and just deemed as 'silly' when in actuality, they are no more silly than having a fear over a teeny tiny house spider which poses absolutely no treat to us humans at all.

having telephonophobia has a huge impact on my daily life, in today's world it is hard to make it through a single day without the phone coming into play at some point. during my last placement the phone would ring continually, but i always ensured that i was never left at the desk alone - else I made myself scarce in case it did ring.

I know I am going to have to "get over it" at some point, LD nursing is very much community based and involves a lot of communication via phone - but it's gonna be a long slow process - so please don't say to me "just get over it" like I have a choice in the matter, because I don't.